If you have been living in the world of the addict for a long time (and many people live in it for years before they even admit to themselves that they have a problem at all), then you are no doubt aware of how it grants you a false sense of power over your own life. The problem is, you have little to no power over anything. And the longer you go on using, the less power you end up having over your life. This may not sound right at first, but the problem with using is that pretty much everything you have starts going toward keeping up the high that just keeps back sliding. After awhile, you just never seem to have enough of anything.
All of your money goes into your habit after awhile. If you can hold down a job, you often find that by the time you have come down from your high, you no longer have money for the little luxuries like rent, gas for your car, or for anything to eat. For a time, you thought you could keep things together, and get high all you wanted while everybody else either didn’t notice or didn’t care. But unfortunately, at some point you finally realized what was probably getting obvious to everybody else- you were seriously out of control. And the bad news is, you will never be in control on your own.
The good news, however, is that you can regain a sane existence in your life. However, there is a small wrinkle in that plan- you have to resort to a higher power, in order to do so. If you have had a hard time swallowing your pride enough to even admit that you have a problem in the first place, then admitting that there is something more powerful than you could be a real doozy. When you admit this, though, you can move on to step 3.